Your Mid-Week Update for 05/21/14

I have been a little busy this week, dear readers. I attended a conference this weekend and I killed a young woman working at the hotel. She didn't do anything particularly wrong, I was just really bored between sessions. There's only so much you can do when you're stuck in a hotel waiting for yet another lecture from yet another stuffed shirt who doesn't quite know what he's talking about. 

Killing people in hotels is difficult. I don't know if you've ever thought about it but you cannot be spontaneous; these kills take careful planning. Unlike victims number 501 through 503. Those kills were nostalgically easy. Like, rat poison in the tea in line at Starbucks, run you over on your morning jog, and take your head off with a tire iron behind the gas station, easy. 

Hotel kills are hard.

There is security everywhere, you need a key for basically every room, and you are watched every second you're in that building. Except in the private rooms and some of the staff areas. For this kill - for me - it didn't matter so much that it was creative, or that the body was never found; I just wanted her dead. I was very careful about finding exactly where all of the security cameras were on the floor below mine. Not too many, it would be easy to slip through the hallways and into a room with relative subtlety. 

Plus, the hotel gave me an early birthday present: one of the elevators was under repair and there were men working on it while I was there. It was fate. Or a poorly managed hotel, one of the two.

Because I was on a nostalgia kick I decided to go a little bloody and messy. Knife. Not the easiest kill but I do love working with my hands on occasion. So, I made a point of talking to both of the maids working on the floor, asking for extra towels, that sort of thing, and I followed the first woman into a room on my way out - obviously to ask for more toilet paper. 

When she turned her back to me, I drove the steak knife I'd swiped from dinner into her spine and watched her drop to the floor in shock. I don't think I hit the nerve I was aiming for but she did begin to bleed out. She was a small woman, elderly with kind eyes. I found it difficult to understand her English but she was very friendly. Even when the lights went out - so slowly, I was starting to get bored - she didn't look angry or sad like so many of my victims. She seemed...at peace. It was refreshing. 

Thank god I packed an extra suitcase because she fit inside the empty one with very little bone breakage, I zipped her up and went on my way. 

I rode the elevator up to the top floor, walked over to the elevator currently under construction, very quickly opened the doors, unzipped my suitcase and let her fall. It was all over in maybe a matter of ten minutes. 

And it was surprisingly satisfying. I know I've said I like the long, drawn out kills but this one was new for me. I've never been so close to the danger of being caught - not in a long time anyways. That part was thrilling as hell. I cannot wait to do it again.

From what I heard from my co-workers on Monday morning, they found her body on the 8th floor. And the 12th and the 3rd. The cameras just happened to be malfunctioning on the top floor - which I honestly had nothing to do with; like I said: Christmas - so there was no way to tell what actually happened to her. They're thinking she killed herself and because the body is in pieces there's no real way to find the cause of death. 

Although I heard one man complaining to the front desk that the bottle of wine they'd ordered the night before had dropped and spilled everywhere, creating a large, red stain on the carpet.

Oops.

I rather enjoyed this kill. It was a little old school and it was certainly a little stressful and dramatic but it was fun. Made me feel kind of like an assassin. Not that I ever would become an assassin. No real freedom. They're so limited by who hires them to do the kills. I don't like those kind of restrictions. But for a while, it was nice to pretend.

And now I'm back to reality and I have to deal with the troubles of being me. As we all do.

As always, dear readers,

Stay Safe

This is a work of fiction. And persons or events with familiarity to real life are incidental and unintentional.