I am a horrible wife.
My anniversary was last Sunday and I completely forgot. I didn’t remember until
I was looking at the calendar a few days ago. I thought Daniel James had
forgot too as he was working all day but then all last week he was giving me
the cold shoulder. I thought it was because of the extra strain but it was just
me. Now I know who put the hole in the wall. That’s…something.
I just feel so horrible.
I never forget. Seven years of marriage and we have always celebrated together.
Last year was a bit of a mess because I was so distracted by my mother’s
revelation about my sister’s freedom but at least we were together.
I tried to make it up
to him; I apologized and I pleaded, and I offered sexual favors, and to make
dinner, and to perform sexual favors while making dinner.
He gave me the finger.
Literally.
He threw an index
finger at me and walked out of the room.
I was stunned for a
moment, but then I threw it in the garburator – even if he’s mad at me, he
knows better than to leave evidence lying around – and I went after him.
James surprised me by
killing Ronnie the Roommate as an anniversary present. He knew that I was
having problems getting around on my crutches and that Ronnie had to die before
my sister killed Daniel’s cousin so he did it for me. He was going to give me
the finger on our anniversary but I forgot. It’s the sweetest gift anyone has ever
given me and I fucked it up. I have to do something, I have to make it up to
him.
Daniel didn’t make the
situation any better. Once I knew about Ronnie the Roommate, I wondered why
Daniel hadn’t confronted me sooner. I knew he would have heard about it right
away. So I went to the house and chatted with Charlotte until Daniel came home
from work – apparently he still has a real job. We went somewhere private to
talk and he reacted to the news… but not in the way I expected.
He kissed me sweetly
and told me he didn’t care.
He said that he’d
heard the news about his old college roommate and he didn’t care because he
could forgive anything I do. And then he sort of cupped my chin and he kissed
me really softly; like he cared.
The bastard is trying
to get in my head the same way I was trying to get in his. And it’s kind of
working. Fresh off of my fight with James – which wasn’t really a fight since
he barely spoke two words, he just stared at me – this new side of Daniel is
really messing with my emotions. I will not let him take control of the
situation. I won’t. I have enough things to worry about other than Daniel’s
weird manipulation tactics. As long as I keep reminding myself of the truth,
then I’ll be fine.
Meanwhile the kids
still aren’t talking to me and my new temp is trying to bore me to death –
which is not a method I’ve tried before and I definitely never will. I can’t
believe I’m actually looking forward to Heather coming back from a holidays.
Just a few more days of this torture. I take back what I said about keeping her
name on file in case I need her again; she’s going on the flammable list. I’m
gonna test that shit out soon if she keeps it up like this.
And speaking of perfectly
justified reactions, I think it might be time to take some drastic measures to
get my children back to normal. I’ll have to keep you updated on that front.
This stalemate can’t go on forever.
As always, dear
readers,
Stay Safe
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