I have been procrastinating writing this update for the last
few hours. I think I officially ran out of things to stab. I am so bored.
Jason is back at school, James is working overtime to gain
favor before his exam, I’m meeting Charlotte for coffee on Friday, Heather has
been insanely polite to me, and I’m back to my regular murder schedule. I am
so, incredibly, bored.
Nothing exciting is happening. Even when I’m stressed out
and panicking, or sick, or seducing a sociopath, at least it’s something
interesting. Something to keep me engaged.
I know I always complain about being overwhelmed and then I
complain about having nothing to do. I’m just never happy. I think that’s all
it is. I will never be completely satisfied with the way my life is run. It’ll
be too slow or too fast with no middle ground.
There is no baby bear.
I will spend the rest of my life seeking moderation only to
never achieve it.
I will never be satisfied.
I need a drink.
EDIT: Okay, this was a very heavy realization for me and I
definitely spent the next hour contemplating my life choices and drinking half
a bottle of wine before driving to work. The best I could come up with was…nothing.
I came up with nothing new or comforting.
I’m just destined to be unhappy forever.
With my loving husband and child.
How’s that for a mid-week update?
As always, dear readers,
Stay Safe
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