Graduation season is possible my favourite time of year –
other than Halloween. It’s a little less work with a built in cause of death
and all those extra bodies running around, celebrating the next chapter in
their lives. Alcohol poisoning is on the rise in the city and it’s only
partially my fault. Drunk driving is also a lot of fun. Not for other people;
for me.
My new favourite is calling the non-emergency line to report
a driver swerving on the road then run them into a ditch. I always try and make
sure they’re actually driving drunk – or at least recklessly – before I kill
them. Really I’m doing the city a favour. We have to keep dangerous people off
the road. I wouldn’t have to kill them if they weren’t there.
However, I can only do it a few times because trends are
dangerous but it’s entertaining to play an innocent bystander. Maybe that’s the
new trend: roleplaying.
I really can’t tell what my mood will be when I wake up in
the morning. Sometimes I like it sneaky and subtle; the times you don’t find
the body for weeks after the fact. Sometimes I’m in the mood for messy and
quick, sometimes torturously slow. It’s really a game of chance how you’ll die
at my hand. Unless you’ve done something to specifically piss me off – then I
promise it will be hilariously ironic and I will blog about it.
This week’s mood seems to be…playful. My own version of
pranking. It’s fun and relaxing which I haven’t done in a while. No more
stalkers, angry husbands, curious children, bitchy co-workers. I can actually
take time to enjoy my craft. And you know what? I will.
I will actually take time for myself the way I did before
the husband and the kids and the stress of maintaining multiple lives. Two is
enough for me, thank you.
I vow here and now to take more time to do the things I
love; to indulge in my more creative urges. Did you know that in all my years,
I’ve never killed anyone with a sewing needle? I think it would take a miracle to
get me to relax after the year I’ve had but I’m up for the challenge.
Actually time for myself without worries. I wonder what that
would be like…
As always, dear readers,
Stay Safe
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