Have you ever had a moment of sudden clarity? You spend your
life doing something so menial and then suddenly you feel more aware of what
you’re doing and why.
There is a washroom at work that has two stalls. I’ve been
with this company for…too long, and it occurred to me yesterday that I’ve only
ever used one stall. I have no idea what the other stall looks like. For all I
know, it’s covered in shit and graffiti; or maybe it’s fitted with the latest
robotic toilets that play music and wipe your ass for you. I may never know.
It’s such a trivial thing to think about but I’m choosing to
take it as a sign of a larger problem. A problem that seems to be almost annual
in my life.
I’m in a rut.
Not a murderous rut this time, I’m feeling quite good about
that aspect of my life. I did some beautiful tapestry work with a blank canvas
and an old-fashioned axe. I may sell it. See if it’s worth anything.
Anonymously of course. Although the money would be nice. Besides, who would care
how the art was created? Don’t those new-age types only care about how the art
makes them feel?
Anyways, I’m not talking about that kind of rut this time. I’m
in a career rut.
I’ve been working in the same field for 15 years and I’ve
been with the same company for most of that time. I enjoy the luxury of my
position and honestly there’s no point in changing it now; I’m just feeling
unsatisfied.
Perhaps a little dissatisfaction is good. If I got my way
every time I’d never have an excuse to kill.
And what kind of world would that be?
Just something to think about this week.
As always, dear readers,
Stay Safe
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