This summer
has absolutely flown by. I cannot believe it’s August already. I was going to
ask the boys if they wanted to go on vacation but we’ve only got a month left
before the fall.
Although…
No one is
confined to a certain schedule. No one is attending school or has any major
plans. What if we took a family trip later in the year? October in Europe might
be interesting. Or perhaps a cruise? I’ve always wanted to go to the Caribbean.
Now is it Car-i-bean or Cari-bee-an?I think it depends on the context but what
do you think, dear readers?
Speaking of
my dear readers, I wanted to talk about you today.
I was
having lunch with Heather the other day and we started talking about murder. After
the incident with her ex-husband, she realized that it had not been my first
time handling a dead body – or the discrete disposal of one – so she asked me
if I had experience I told her I had.
People who
kill together have no secrets. Or at least they shouldn’t.
She knows
that I at least kill people or have killed people in the past (enough to be
calm in the face of trauma) so at lunch yesterday, she asked me a very interesting
question:
How do you
choose your victims?
First, I
assured her that I’m not some secret government agent or ruthless assassin –
although I would make an excellent Black Widow-type…if I hit the gym a little
bit more than one a month. Killing is a sport for me. It’s a weekend hobby that
I’m quite good at. Most days, there’s no rhyme or reason to who I choose. If
they cross my path, they’re a potential victim. But then she said: “but not
everyone you choose wanders down a dark alley alone in the middle of the night,
how do you get them alone?”
Here’s
where you come in, dear readers.
When I say
everyone is a potential victim, I mean it. There is no safety in numbers, there
is no protection under a streetlight, you’re not safe in a crowded room. If
someone is intent on harming you, they will find a way and you are not safe
unless you can fight back – and even that is not a guarantee.
The best
thing you can do is avoid being careless. Opportunistic killers are much easier
to handle. I swim between the realms of “opportunistic” and “targeted” so some
of this will apply to my potential victims.
The easiest
way for me to trap someone is if they’re walking alone at night. There’s less
light, less people, and less awareness of your surroundings. However, I’ve
absolutely backed away from someone who was on the phone with a loved one. If I
know your absence will be missed right away, I’ll admit, I’m less inclined to
take the opportunity. If you’ve been targeted for a specific reason then you’re
shit out of luck, sweetie pie. Your loved ones may very well hear you die but
that’s how it goes.
If you’re
in a group, it is easier than you think to be snatched from the back of a pack.
I sometimes do this just for fun. To prove I can do it. The ultimate goal is
isolation so if you’re already alone, or you’ve fallen behind from your group,
beware. Day or night, it’s not that hard. I will say, if you fight me, there’s
a 50% chance I’ll want to kill you more out of spite. There’s no guarantee.
Your only hope of survival is to not get caught.
Those of
the big ones when it comes to isolating and killing. If you’re alone – or I can
easily get you alone – and you piss me off, you’re done for.
Now not
everyone who walks alone at night down a dark, deserted alley, will become a
victim. It’s a numbers game. You could go your whole life without being
murdered.
That was a
little joke.
The point
is, everyone I pass is a potential target, but that doesn’t mean that everyone
will become one. My advice to the living and potentially dead is this: keep
going. If you’re going to die at my hands then it will happen no matter what
you do. So enjoy your life. Leave good things behind when I kill you.
And as
always, dear readers,
Stay Safe
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