Your Midweek Update for 09/15/21

You know what I love so much? Year-End reporting.

You know what I’m lying through my teeth about loving?

Fucking Year-End reporting.

Who decided that the fiscal year ended in September? For that matter, who decided that the calendar year ended in December? Who decided there would be 12 months in a year? Who decided how we would measure time? What even is time? Why does any of this matter?

…

So I’ve taken my pain meds and I am slightly calmer. Bad news is: I am now exhausted out of my mind. Honestly, though, I feel like this week has flown by – and not in a good way. I have no idea what’s happened between last week and this week. That’s

I’ve completely lost my train of thought.

I hate this feeling.

I’m physically helpless because of a stupid accident. Not being able to go out for kills has been hard enough. On Saturday night, James brought me home a victim tied in the trunk of his car. It was very sweet – and I did enjoy slicing her from navel to chin and watching her guts slowly spill open like a baked potato – but it didn’t have the same thrill I’m used to. Being able to catch my own prey, as it were, is an essential part of my life. And besides, I can’t have my husband bringing me home some poor victim every night. It’s like junk food: it’s only a treat if it happens infrequently. I love when James picks out victims. It’s incredibly erotic and it brings us closer together as a couple. This just felt cheap.

But at least I can still kill this way.

It’s the pain meds. They make me lethargic and I have trouble focusing and yet I can’t quite get to sleep because my body is restless. I have not been enjoying my time, let me tell you. Without the medication, I can’t put any weight on my knees. Any stretch or compression that tugs my kneecaps out of alignment has me seeing stars. It’s unbearable.

It feels like there’s no real winning, here, and that is probably the worst part: there’s no good answer. There’s no work around or solution that will keep me happy. I just feel…trapped.

I know this wasn’t the happiest update, I apologize, dear readers. I’ll try to have something more entertaining for next week.

As always, dear readers,

Stay Safe